Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick. http://tfl.nu/f71t
  Replies (2) Good night (671) Bad night (979)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (574): I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI. http://tfl.nu/701e
  Replies (19) Good night (3882) Bad night (480)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (302): Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life http://tfl.nu/pzmw
  Replies (67) Good night (5894) Bad night (1211)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart. http://tfl.nu/liah
  Replies (22) Good night (6970) Bad night (1016)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal http://tfl.nu/x7fc
  Replies (19) Good night (6059) Bad night (1749)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon http://tfl.nu/s25m
  Replies (5) Good night (4591) Bad night (1067)
• Favorite

  (805): View more from California

  I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (805): I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form. http://tfl.nu/c7k9
  Replies (9) Good night (4467) Bad night (1276)
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine. http://tfl.nu/o5fg
  Replies (15) Good night (2720) Bad night (1236)
• Favorite

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (504): I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit. http://tfl.nu/0gcq
  Replies (21) Good night (861) Bad night (1327)
• Favorite

  (920): View more from Wisconsin

  Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (920): Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA. http://tfl.nu/o6qd
  Replies (5) Good night (1215) Bad night (818)
• Favorite

  (808): View more from Hawaii

  Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (808): Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles http://tfl.nu/r6w3
  Replies (8) Good night (942) Bad night (471)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.

  (1-270): View more from Kentucky

  Hey I found a cat!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (270): Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do. (1-270): Hey I found a cat! http://tfl.nu/yvuv
  Replies (7) Good night (1702) Bad night (301)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs http://tfl.nu/afix
  Replies (2) Good night (642) Bad night (489)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue http://tfl.nu/w6vq
  Replies (3) Good night (370) Bad night (622)
• Favorite

  (606): View more from Kentucky

  You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (606): You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep. http://tfl.nu/jgge
  Replies (1) Good night (112) Bad night (320)

Randomize