I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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