My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
He just lit his joint with the tiki torches around his pool. He is definitely coming to my future parties
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
Randomize
