Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
They kept freaking out that you were missing and potentially having sex.. like it was a bad thing. Got fed up with hearing it so i just yelled "ITS HER BIRTHDAY AND SHE CAN FUCK IF SHE WANTS TO!" They gave me unnecessary looks. I thought it was acceptable.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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