I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
Randomize