That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
So many bounce houses so little time
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
I feel awkward having to tell people “sorry you can’t finger me because I will get a UTI and I don’t have health insurance”
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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