so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Reason #84 I'm on my way to becoming a crazy cat lady: I called the police last night because I heard a noise and the cats were acting funny like they were trying to tell me something. The 3rd time the dispatcher repeated "the cats are acting funny?" I yelled and told her to have an officer ask the cats what happened.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
