I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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