I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
