i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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