I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
