The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize