i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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