also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
I just sucked dick on a ferry
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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