Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
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