I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
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