Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Randomize
