you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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