Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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