Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
