I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
