i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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