nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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