Quick, to the slutcave!
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I just saw an appointment in my phone called "it's been a month" I think I drunkly did that after I slept with Paul to remind myself to check if I got knocked up... I'm smarter drunk than sober.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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