so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.