great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Kids I used to babysit are now fuckable members of my social media periphery.. Getting old sucks
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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