Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
