oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
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