TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
