Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Just high enough for therapy.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize
