and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
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