i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
