i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
