We're like a lot better than the average bears
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
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