I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
1. No more tequila 2. Why do you let me say slutty things? 3. I woke up and our apartment was covered in cake? 4. Love you
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
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