remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Apparently 'check out this motherfucker' is not an appropriate greeting to use in the vicinity of sitting united states senators. Who knew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
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