dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
There was confetti in my vomit this morning... Happy New Year!!
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
