What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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