no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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