People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
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