i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Out of ice. Vodka+club soda+cut up lime popscicle=I'm an alcoholic genius.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
