dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
Randomize