Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
listening to happy ending by mika while imagining him to run after me at an aiport in slow motion... also, dipping oreos in baileys. not taking this breakup well. at. all.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
Randomize
