party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
Don't send me heart emojis when you're jacking off.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
