Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
