im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
You know youre getting old when you I.D. the person trying to take you home to be sure they're over 25. Help me.
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