i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
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