That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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