How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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