Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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