I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
