My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
