Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
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You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
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You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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