so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
Randomize
